Attachment is a part of all loves and relationships
Oh the love! This feeling is present in the most diverse relationships: from friendships to family ties, not forgetting, of course, romantic relationships. As common as love seems, it presents itself under different types, has attachment as one of its characteristics and can be interpreted in different ways by people. “Love is a constellation of several things, behaviors, cognitions, emotions, motivations. All of this is associated with the desire to enter into an intimate relationship with another person, and that intimate relationship can be sexual or not,” says professor Jaroslava Varella Valentova from the Institute of Psychology at USP.
types of love
Talking about love is talking about love. However, there is not only one division, since, over the decades, the topic has been studied by several scholars and has been defined and redefined in various ways. Although it is no longer used in research, it is important to remember the Theory of Colors, by Canadian psychologist John Alan Lee. ”He was inspired by this classification of loves by the ancient Greeks: Eros , which would be physical attraction, passion, sexuality; while Storge would be a familial love, romantic love that can grow out of a friendship, that requires commitment, and Ludus, the third type, would be a love without commitment, like a quick game, the person basically trying to play with another person”, says the teacher. The name is Color Theory because Lee identifies Eros as red, Storge as yellow, and Ludus as blue.
There are still three more types that are complementary to these, that is, they are formed from the junction of two of these three main loves. The one represented by purple is Mania ( Eros + Ludus ), a jealous and obsessive love; orange is Agape ( Eros + Storge ), an altruistic love guided more by reason than emotion; and green, Pragma ( Ludus + Storge ), which corresponds to love that considers different characteristics and ponders them.
attachment
Even though there are many loves, attachment is something common to them. Attachment may seem like a possessive feeling and very much related to the control of the other, but, in fact, one of its biases is the maintenance of the relationship.
Loves, whether related to friendship, family or the romantic side, have attachment as a characteristic to a greater or lesser extent. “This attachment system is very important, because it serves to keep people together in relationships. So, emotional attachment is typical between parents and children, between friends, partners as well. Romantic attachment is usually accompanied by feelings of ease, comfort and happiness when people are together, it’s a really deep union. Attachment plays a crucial role in maintaining the relationship”, comments Jaroslava.
Interpretations
“Often, people interpret their relationship a little differently. Even when you ask couples, for example, when their relationship began, you will see that each one will tell a slightly different story”, analyzes the teacher. Thus, each person, with their individual experiences, will interpret love in different ways.
Jaroslava adds: “The scientific definitions of the importance of love for human beings have different levels: it increases the quality of the relationship, the satisfaction and also the maintenance of the relationship in the most distal or evolutionary biological way”.